Saturday, July 12, 2008


So, once again the weight of the world comes crashing down on me, and I am no Atlas. When a person such as myself who has little in life comes to lose even that, any motivation he may have to try and survive this world is lost.

I realize that my main motivation for getting a place again, was the chance that I would be able to restore relationships with my children. Well, finally I was able to connect with them - and as best I could I let them know how much I loved them, and how much I wanted to be a part of their lives. Before, I couldn't even do that. But, they have responded with silence. There is no motivation within them to seek me out - to have me in their lives. Could they really care less?

And, then there is all of the rest of the world that seems to be losing it's collective mind. It really seems that a collapse of civilization is eminent. Is it that our planet is about to die, and us with it? The North Pole will be melted by the end of Summer. How insane is that?

So, what is the point of anything, anymore? The canary in the coal mine is laying on the bed of it's cage, gasping for breath.