Don't get me wrong. I love San Diego. I am so glad I am back. The weather, the land, the city, is all very beautiful. But, the memories are awful. Oh, sure, there were some few bright spots in my life - nothing is ever 100% bad or 100% good. Still, I can't think on my life growing up in San Diego without remembering the bad things that happened, and the overall dread and despair I felt constantly. These sad memories have been with me all my life, yet occasionally I'd remember another thing that I'd repressed, and I'd add that to the list. Sometimes it would be an old memory brought back stronger or with more detail that I'd forgotten. A lot of that is happening now that I'm back in San Diego. Each memory has to be dealt with as if dealing with it for the first time.