Showing posts with label perception. Show all posts
Showing posts with label perception. Show all posts

Thursday, June 5, 2014

What I Learned From Fox News And Negative People


I know something about negative people.  I was raised by them.  To be honest, in my 53 years as a human I have never met anyone as negative at my own parents.  Nearly everything they said about the world was negative, nearly everything they said about me and to me was negative.

Negativity:

  • Negativity is addictive.
  • People addicted to negativity don't realize that they are being negative.
  • Negativity is related to depression.
  • Negativity is used to control people.
  • Negativity is a trait of judgmental people.
  • Fox News is popular because it feeds the addiction of negativity.
  • I am a recovering negative person.
Given that I also suffer from Asperger's Syndrome, the damage done by my parent's negativity cannot be overlooked.  Not only did I have difficulty as a kid understanding the world around me because of Aspergers, my parent's influence made me deathly afraid of the world and most everything in it.  This pushed me into deep isolation which only made things more difficult.

A person does not learn without outside influences.  Over the years, though, I have met enough non-negative people to understand my parents for who they are.   For the longest time I held the common child's impression that my parents were god like.  And this perception lasted longer than it should have because I had no other influences in my life to counter it.   For my mother, this fit her particular aims of control.  When I was two or three years old, my mother miscarried.  This event had a tremendous emotional impact on her, and she became overly protective and possessive, her youngest child - me.  She would have no other children after.

Another interesting aspect of my parents was that, as much as they found fault in everything, no one was ever allowed to mention any thing negative about them.  My parents might have admitted to not being perfect, but they would never actually admit to any particular failing.  They would deny having a fault, then would become angry towards whoever brought up the issue.  Not only did they do this with me, I witnessed them do this with others, not just with other children, but with adults as well.  Despite whatever I did, my parents would think of the most negative aspect of it and focus all their time and energy on it.   As you might imagine, this cause me to grow up depressed.

This depressed kid eventually became a depressed adult.  When therapists asked me if i was depressed, I did not understand the question, and did not know how to respond.  This was because I had been depressed my entire life, and had no other emotion to compare it with.  I had never known what it was like to not be depressed.  Depression was my normal state of being.  There were rare moments when I wasn't feeling depressed, but it was such an odd state of being that it scared me, and thought it wrong somehow.

There are a lot of negative people in the world.  That's what fox news has taught me. People who are negative towards things actually feed off of negativity.  Hearing and seeing other negative things feeds their own negativity.   A negative person who is surrounded by daisies and puppy dogs (or anything positive) cannot maintain their negativity.  Instead they consume negativity like it's an addiction.   And that is why fox news is so popular.  It churns out negativity at levels never before seen in the media. Sure, fox news is a Republican propaganda machine, but fox news doesn't focus much attention on the positive aspects of Republicans.  Instead it turns everything else into something negative. It works on the assumption that if negative labels are placed on Democrats, and liberals in general, people will fill in the blanks with positive labels on Republicans and conservatives, whether or not they are any positive aspects about them.

Some people might say that I'm politically biased.  But I ask you to think about this.  To be liberal is to be charitable, open and giving, compassionate and forgiving.   A person cannot be these things and at the same time be a negative person.  Having negative thoughts and being a loving caring person does not equate.  It's a non sequitur.  It is illogical.

Being that there are so many negative people in the world, certainty some will discover my blog.   They may even leave comments, spewing their negativity, and attempting to justify it.  They'll take everything I talk about and twist it around to something negative - either about things I've done, or worse, about me personally.   There was a time when I thought that the best way to deal with this negativity was to fight it head on.   I used to allow their negative comments and then I would respond, delineating exactly where and why they were wrong.   The problem with this approach, I've since learned, is that regardless of what I say, negative people will always be drawn to negative things and will not hear what I have to say.  Even when I prove beyond a doubt that someone was wrong about me or whatever I did, the negative people won't pay attention to it, they'll just continue to suck at the teat of truculence.

So, I have decided that I will no longer respond to these negative people.  I will no longer broadcast their comments, even if I could easily counter their statements with the truth.  Instead I'll continue doing what I do.   That some people are still irritated by the mere existence of my blog, I take that to mean I'm doing something right.